This just in. Madonna has an ass!

We get it Madonna. You have an ass. You know, most people have asses; they help us when we want to sit down. But just because you have one, doesn't mean we all want to see you rubbing your cheeks to a disco beat. Don't get me wrong, we are all happy that you have one. We know it's important to you, but I think it's time to pack it away in sweats and give us all a break. You got more miles out of it than most people do, and you should be proud of that. It's time to move on. It's called life, and it's something we must all come to turns with.